Though I love having my Lancer and having owned it for the past 6 years, tons of memories will always remain in me with that car, but as they say “change is inevitable”. My main goal for next year and the one that’s really pushing me to save up, is day-dreaming of having a new set of wheels … a Kia Picanto to be more specific … I’m really fallin’ in love with that car.
I was browsing through different download sites earlier, looking for any atom/rss readers I could find for this corporate-beat-old laptop that I have. I couple of results did come up, there’s feedreader, rssreader and the best I think is feeddemon, though the latter isn’t free.
There were a couple of things to consider to sort out the best one that’s for me, I’d really like to have a stand-alone client, something that I can use away from my browser, I want to use my browser for its main purpose “browsing”, that’s why I don’t want any plug-in that I can just stick to firefox or IE, I don’t find it comfortable really. The other irritating part is most of the ones that I did like won’t actually work unless you have Microsoft .NET Framework installed on your PC which is about 20 megabytes … so if your on dial-up, might as well get an all-nighter pre-paid ISP card just to make sure it’ll be done with the darn thing even before you wake-up.
I’d think that I’ve managed to make things blurred into your eyes, this has nothing to do with what your seeing in me, it’s all about me thinking of a better way to make things easier … for the both of us. There’s so much I’d like to say, to show and to do, everything with you, but my life isn’t built for such high-spirited endeavors, it has always been what it is … a big uncompromiseable mess. I can’t answer the when, why’s and how’s, or whether this life would eventually be at ease.
I’ve come to terms with what I have become, not because of isolation or the intent of it, but because of traumatic reoccurrence of emotional dismemberment. I’ve kept my emotion set to a level that it wouldn’t be scarred … to an extent that is, my feelings blossom with complete certainty with you, I feel contenment inching through the tips of my fingers and I’ve come to see myself wanting to smile everyday as I’m with you … I just don’t want to be let down again, and for that I am terrified.
I could hardly feel the cool air breeze, when I walked by the side street of makati on the way to work at quarter to nine. Must’ve been something in my head that’s been bugging me all day … it must’ve been something this year that doesn’t make sense to even things out and bring balance back into my life.
A couple more days and this year would then be just a memory, another memory that’ll stick into my head, bringing regrets and lost promises to blossom anew in the coming year. “I want to feel, like I have felt before”, this one line from a song unknowingly blended to the already chaotic swarn of thoughts goin’ through my head, heaved more regrets and depressive emotions that I’ve been feeling, so much for that oh! so magical christmas spirit, it seems to be picking-up.
Wasting time doing nothing in the confines of the new company’s training room, a couple of co-trainees gobbling up free meal left-overs offered by a generous employee early in the evening, another, one actually situated just next to me si ruthlessly exploiting corporate internet bandwidth, playing online rpg games, and a buddy of mine a co-former-call-center agent doing the same thing.
We just had our lunches and are back to heat-up our comfy reclinable chairs to waste another 4 hours as corporate slaves. Several tech leads had walked-by to ensure that our questions are given adequate attention, a couple of laughs are blurted out right thanks to non-sense and somewhat stupid questions, I guess that’s the reason why we’re trainees, to open up and spew out scrutinizable inquiries.
